The tree is up...has been for a week and I still haven't put any decorations on it. I have Santa hats on my dining chairs but my tablecloth still screams Happy Thanksgiving!. Bronchitis, croup, dental fillings, pharmacy phone tag, and a partridge in a pear tree called health insurance has made a week off from work quite not what I had thought it was going to be.
I'm planning on taking my daughter to a funeral for a childhood friend. The whole thing just makes me sad and mad. Parents shouldn't be allowed to go through the worst hell on earth like that. Oh, I've had lots of talks with God about things like that. I see a lot of stuff that makes me just go, Ugh...really, God? Really!? I heard a sermon the other day about being cynical in our faith and I have to admit there are times I go there. I can be cynical. There are days I just throw my hands up in the air and just say, "Ya know, God is God...I am done trying to make sense of the Man!" Isn't that what He told Moses anyway, he said, "I Am Who I Am." Ok, well, that still doesn't answer the question, is what I want to say but guess what..."I Am Who I Am" has to be good enough.
I used to think that when we died we'd know all the answers to everything. I don't know if that's true anymore. Honestly, there are things I'd rather not know and if God's will is on earth as it is in Heaven then I'm not really sure we are meant to ever know all the answers. If heaven is what it's claimed to be...I don't think we'll care, really.
So, where does this leave me. Thankful I got a fake poinsettia at Bunco the other night, that's for sure! With the rate I'm getting the Christmas thing going a real poinsettia would not have stood a chance in this house. Makes me want to go ahead and fill out the survey for the pizza place for a free Crazy Bread, not stress over not finding Rudolph stamps, stay in my pajamas even if I go to Wal-Mart today, leave Santa milk and tofu instead of cookies because I'm still bitter I never got a pink Barbie car for Christmas (Barbie had to ride on top of the Little People School Bus to pick up her friends for crying out loud!), and I hope that my silverware from last year that was packed in a box during the move will finally pop up in the Christmas decorations box! Oh, and if anyone has hidden my Feliz Navidad singing Chihuaha as they have in years past...well, guess what...I'm not in the mood. We are having a Feliz Navidad with the chihuaha or there's no Christmas at all. Good Day!
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